Interfaith Families in Greater MetroWest

Tell us about you and your family (partner, children, extended family). 
My husband, John, and I have been happily married as an intercultural and interfaith marriage since the beginning of the pandemic. We have great family support in New Jersey, New York and even as far as Israel. John works for a fertility pharmacy and I work in criminal court.

How would you describe your own and your family’s religious or cultural identity?   
My husband identifies as a spiritualist and I identify as an Asian/Hispanic Jew even though I was born to a Jewish Peruvian mother and Bhuddist Vietnamese father. My mother-in-law is Italian Catholic which adds an interesting dynamic to the holidays we celebrate.

How do you and your family celebrate and express your religious/cultural identity? 
My husband and I enjoy celebrating some of the major holidays such as Lunar New Year, Easter, Passover, Rosh Hashanah, Hanukkah, and Christmas. It’s a big to-do for our families and we get together and celebrate with each other. Religious differences do not deter from love, respect, familiarity, or celebrations.

Please share a significant experience that has shaped your family’s relationship to Jewish community or Judaism. 
My Jewish identity was greatly strengthened during a Birthright Israel trip, making Aliyah, then living in Israel for a few years. This allowed me to explore not only a religion but a culture more closely and more completely. After getting married, my husband and I participated in Honeymoon Israel, which allowed him to get some of the cultural experiences and joy that I was able to previously enjoy and it was a privilege and pleasure to not only relive those experiences but also share them with someone I love. We both had a great time and made lifelong friends through this experience.

If someone in your family is not Jewish, how do they identify? Do they participate in Jewish life? If so, how? 
My family is interesting in this regard. I’ve previously mentioned my mother, husband, and my in-laws… but my two sisters both identify as Jewish even though they do not actively practice, despite both having visited Israel many times between them. It’s an interesting thing to identify but not practice. What matters is that we all have strong Jewish values.

Tell us about you and your family (partner, children, extended family)
My husband, Adam Buchsbaum, and I have been married for 32 years.  When we were engaged, I agreed to raise our future children as Jews even though I didn’t understand what I was signing up for.  Luckily, I was a quick learner.  We raised our daughters, Elena and Shira, in a Jewish home and at Temple B’nai Or, an inclusive Reform community in Morristown. After 29 years of marriage, I decided to convert to Judaism.  The family joke is that I made a rash decision!

How would you describe your own and your family’s religious or cultural identity?
How I describe myself and our family has changed over time.  Early on, I described myself as a wife and mother in a Jewish family and our family-of-four as interfaith, even though we only practiced Judaism.  Today, I describe myself as a Jew-by-choice, our family of four as Just Jewish, and our extended family as multicultural. Our large Thanksgiving dinners and Pesach seders resemble a convening of the U.N… in a good way. We embrace and celebrate everyone who joins our family.

How do you and your family celebrate and express your religious/cultural identity?
Celebrating Shabbat together every week is the most meaningful and joyous expression of our religious identity.  When our daughters were young, I tried to learn about every Jewish holiday that was celebrated at home and involved food that I could make.  For Purim, I once attempted to bake hamantaschen, which sadly turned out like hockey pucks.  Ever since, I buy them at the bakery.  My ethnic heritage is Irish and Spanish.  Adam is an amazing chef and I am blessed with his homemade corned beef and cabbage on St. Patrick’s Day and Spanish dishes all year long. Shira’s partner, Pharoah, is not Jewish yet they have agreed to have a Jewish home. Once on a Shabbat during Hanukkah, he asked which candles should be lit first.  I remembered pondering the same question and it made me smile.

Please share a significant experience that has shaped your family’s relationship to Jewish community or Judaism.
Conversion was the most significant experience for me.  After living in a Jewish family and community for almost three decades, I felt completely at ease and prepared and yet was surprised by how deeply I was moved, especially at the mikvah.

Each of us has a unique relationship to Judaism and Jewish peoplehood.  Only recently have I come to understand the myriad ways in which Jews relate to their Jewishness and to recognize and appreciate that diversity in our nuclear and extended family.

If someone in your family is not Jewish, how do they identify? Do they participate in Jewish life? If so, how?
Vis a vis religious and cultural identities, our extended family is wildly diverse. We have Jews who practice Judaism and are engaged in Jewish community and Jews who are not; parents who are children of interfaith parents and are raising their own children as Jews, and those who are not; partners of Jews who participate actively in Jewish life, some who do not, and some who practice their own faith.  Our extended family always shows up for each other, no matter the life cycle ritual or holiday, Jewish or not.  I think our efforts to remain united despite diverse origins and perspectives increases our empathy for and acceptance of each other and, hopefully, others whom we encounter in the world.

Tell us about you and your family (partner, children, extended family)
My name is Michel and my husband Oren and I are proudly raising our girls in a home where we strongly value both of our cultures. Oren has a Jewish background with strong ties to Israel through his family and grew up immersed in both the religious and cultural aspects of Judaism. I’m originally from the Dominican Republic and have a very racially diverse background. My ethnicity and culture is a big part of who I am and it’s important to us that our children are exposed to it and also feel identified with that part of their history.

How would you describe your own and your family’s religious or cultural identity? 
We are very proud to be a multicultural Jewish household.  We have forged our own identity while taking different parts of our upbringing, making new traditions and melding our cultures.

How do you and your family celebrate and express your religious/cultural identity?
As a family, we prioritize celebrating both our religious and cultural identities in our day to day life. Our children are exposed to their Jewish ancestry while at their Early Childhood Center and at home we also incorporate their Dominican heritage by infusing Spanish language, music and food into their day.

Please share a significant experience that has shaped your family’s relationship to Jewish community or Judaism.
The aftermath of October 7 was a major turning point in our lives and increased our sense of urgency when it came to building a stronger Jewish community. It became imperative for us as parents to educate ourselves more and to find others who share our values. We were reminded of Judaism’s focus on family, traditions, community and the desire to leave the world better than we entered it.

If someone in your family is not Jewish, how do they identify? Do they participate in Jewish life? If so, how?
I was born into a Roman Catholic family and most of them today still practice some form of Christianity. We are beyond grateful that they have always been open to participating in Jewish life whether it is by coming to celebrate Jewish holidays at our home or attending Shabbats at our children’s ECC.