If you had asked me a few years ago the impact Jewish Federation of Greater MetroWest NJ makes on teens and their families, I would have likely given you a vague response. However, in that time, as Cooperman Community Engagement chair, I witnessed first-hand the power and magic of our teen initiatives both for hundreds of youths in our community as well as for my own daughter.
I had a front row seat this year while our daughter was a fellow in the Diller Teen Program that Federation runs in partnership with the Helen Diller family foundation. This program spans the globe in 32 communities and provides rising sophomores and juniors the opportunity to hone their Jewish identity, make an impact in the world, and find their voice as a leader in the Jewish community.
Like many things in life, the process takes time. Truthfully, things started off a little shaky a year ago. Put 20 Greater MetroWest teens (most of whom were strangers) in a room together for six hours, and the anxiety and uncertainty were palpable. But under the guidance of our professional staff, it quickly became clear that they were creating a space where the fellows could form deep friendships and discover new passions.
Each month, they would come together for a mifgash (encounter) to learn new skills and foster that sense of connection. Specifically, spending three shabbatons away from the world, technology, and school helped the teens band together, find their unique styles and create close friendships built on mutual admiration and respect. As a parent, these shabbatons seemed like an intensive Jewish summer camp experience packed into a few short days. Our daughter returned home each time with more confidence, discovering strengths she didn’t know she possessed.
In April, one of the wildest experiences happened. The Diller cohort from our partner community Rishon LeZion came to New Jersey. We had the pleasure of hosting Maayan for 10 days. These teens had experienced similar Diller programming to our kids, while also living through over a year of war. From the minute they stepped off the plane, the energy, enthusiasm, and ruach (spirit) that these Israeli teens arrived with was over the top. Not only did the NJ teens greet their guests with signs and songs, but they also greeted them with warmth, hugs and friendship. You’d think they’d known each other for years. Our Israeli Diller teen felt like she belonged in our family. The girls stayed up very, very late talking, laughing and bonding over their new shared experiences. It was as if we had a newfound daughter join our family.
It is remarkable to look back and realize just how meaningful the dancing, singing and cheering was for us. Although positioned as helping the Israelis feel welcomed and comfortable in our home, it also had the effect of bringing up our spirits. This past year was a tough one for all of us, with so much sadness, widespread antisemitism, and the demonization of Israel. This experience gave our whole family a much-needed jolt of hope. Hope that despite all of the sadness and loss, that we as Jews, and specifically Jewish youth, have each other. These new connections and bridges really do make a difference.
As a Diller parent, I really enjoyed meeting other Diller families and getting to know both the New Jersey and Israeli teens. As the year progressed, we no longer were just observers to our daughter’s experience but started recognizing this was something for us too. The connection, learning, and opportunity for doing good brought us into a new Federation space we were so happy to discover.
This past year has been revolutionary for our daughter.
She is prouder to be Jewish, despite social media’s constant attacks and how scary it can feel to be Jewish these days. She is confident that Judaism and standing up for Israel will be important parts of her life going forward. She is also walking away with the skills, strength, and spirit to tackle a very challenging world. The Diller program gave her the platform and the tools to build upon. Our Federation gave her the scaffolding and setting to change her future. And our family is stronger and better because of this.
The path forward is not clear but what is, is that each one of us has the opportunity to lean in to being Jewish. If you have the opportunity to do something (even through the lens of your children), then go for it. For me it was a truly magical ride!